Supporting fathers in the neonatal intensive care unit. “You realize you’re not alone”
Sunnybrook has enhanced support for families in its neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) through the creation of a dads’ support group.
The weekly “Dads’ Den” offers fathers with a baby in the hospital’s NICU an opportunity to casually chat about any challenges they may be facing. Sessions are hosted by Dr. Martin Skidmore, a retired neonatologist with almost 50 years of experience working with parents. He’s supported by Ophelia Kwakye, NICU Family Support Specialist, and Luisa King, a breastfeeding resource nurse.
“My biggest hope is that the dads share with each other. Fathers with a baby in the NICU often feel pulled in multiple directions. They want to bond with their baby and support their partner, but they’re often still working and managing everything outside of the hospital,” explains Dr. Skidmore, saying two granddads have even attended. “The reality is that it can be quite stressful and isolating having an infant in the NICU. This weekly group is a safe space to share and learn, and even have a laugh or two.”
A group of fathers gathers for ‘Dads’ Den.’
For Manu Pasam, whose son was born at just under 23 weeks in February, the groups have been a highlight of his time at the hospital. “I recall talking about Heyansh’s chest tubes. My wife and I were going through a lot. Dr. Skidmore gave me a hug, and the other dads spoke about their difficult milestones. You realize you’re not alone.”
Manu says a highlight is having Dr. Skidmore speak very simply about the medical terms parents encounter in the unit. The additional information and support has boosted his confidence in being at the hospital every day for his son, despite the distance from the family’s home in Newmarket, Ontario.
Manu and Dr. Skidmore share a light moment.
His baby, born weighing 525 grams, is now thriving, and there’s discussion around discharge from the hospital. “I’ve graduated from being the new parent, scared and overwhelmed, to the dad who is more experienced and can help others,” says Manu with a smile. “I’m grateful to everyone in the unit, and in particular Dr. Skidmore and the other dads I’ve connected with along our journey.”
Dr. Asaph Rolnitsky, Chief of Newborn and Development Paediatrics at Sunnybrook, explains the sessions, which started in 2024, tie in directly with the unit’s commitment to family-centred care.
“Our goal is to integrate families as active partners in their baby’s care,” adds Dr. Rolnitsky. “The fathers’ sessions ultimately promote a supportive and safe environment to share information with those who truly understand what you’re going through.”
